# creates fontdir lines for xorg.conf
find /usr/share/fonts -name fonts.dir|sed -re 's/^/FontPath "/g' -e 's/\/(\w|\.)+$/\/"/g'

# grabs the temperature from google
# replace google.com with google.ca or google.co.uk for celcius
# works as of 2009-06-29, shouldn't break again for a while
wget -qO- -U '' 'google.com/search?q=weather+14224' | grep -oP '(-)?\d{1,3}\xB0[FC]' | head -n1

# rips all of the links out of a page
wget -qO- http://endlessbeta.org/|grep -oiP '<a.+?href="[^>]+?".*?>'|sed -re 's/.+?href="//ig' -e 's/".*$//g'

# this will get you the ladies
echo -n 'i like you, do you like me [y/n] ' && read -e i && if [[ $i == 'n' ]]; then echo 'aww...'; elif [[ $i == 'y' ]]; then wall 'elation!'; fi

# this one counts the number of connections to any of your IP addresses by any host
netstat -utW|awk '!/^(Active|Proto)/{print $4,$5}'|sort|uniq -c|sort -n